Biro's Inspiratos

An automatic revelation by Papa Dada

I was contemplating what you said last night, and I realise that I can never forgive you for what you did. I mean, honestly, did you think that the rabbit was a joke? I was really humiliated. How could you? Often at times I thought you loved me, I thought you cared about me. But how silly of me! I was fooled! Fooled. I don't dare think anything beyond the dull refines of my current thought processes- you, who criticised me so much for this. I cannot and will not put up with your lies and your disgraceful behaviour any longer. I remember you once said you wanted to live with me. What changed? What went on in that desperate mind of yours? How could you have moved in with that degenerate oaf? I absolutely hated her years ago, she was the sickest aspect of my thinking laid before me in innocent actualisation. Oh the beat of my deadly heart right now. When I looked into your eyes last night I saw a zombie, a peanut, an Elvis portrait, and a fairground ride like the one we went on that summer. What was really gazing back at me? You have lost all my respect for you! I wish you had never revealed what you revealed to me. It is too much to bear! Please take it all back. I promise I will take what you said and bury it deep, deep, deep in the potted plant that lies rotting on my window sill. I cannot forgive you D, I cannot, I will not. Don't ever call me again, delete my numbers from all your phones. I cannot bear to think that you might text me late one night in a moment of insignificant horniness- do I mean that little? Do I? Don't answer that. In fact don't answer any of this. I demand nothing from you except that you release me. Release me please. Renounce your faith in me. Your faith in my obedience to you. End all communication with my friends too. I know you have always been meaning to call H, but don't now. Please don't. He would welcome your call too much and I couldn't bear it. God, I hate myself right now, I just sighed so heavily. I sighed for the present despair and the present nonsense that you left here last night. Last night, last night. That rabbit was a mighty bitch Goddess leading me down a broken shaft. Why must you punish my future happiness with one simple revelation? Why? Ok I have had enough of writing this now. My hands are beginning to ache.